Fostering Compassion Across Cultures

Finally...

I'm relieved and excited that The Bird and The Fish: Memoir of a Temporary Marriage is published and available from Lulu Publishers. It will be another few weeks before Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and the Ingram network can offer the book as well.

The writing and publishing process has been a long journey for me that started with a wish to create greater compassion and understanding between people in the United States and Iran. After having a few people read the unpublished manuscript, I learned that my original wish might not be granted. Each of us comes to a story with our own lens, and what we see and allow to enter our consciousness is processed through all our other stories, especially the ones we heard and learned as children.

I'm working on letting go of expectations about how my story will affect readers. Results are out of my control, right? And we humans are experts at judging people as good or bad, right and wrong, kind or mean. No one enjoys negative judgments and so I'd like to ask you that if you notice yourself getting irritated, frustrated or angry by Afshin or Miriam’s words or actions, would you ask yourself what might be motivating them? Would you see if you can come up with three guesses? My hope is that by doing that you will connect with them compassionately.

Have you ever been convinced that you knew why someone acted a certain way only to find out later that you were mistaken? With curiosity and openness I've learned a lot about myself and others. That's why I’m inviting you to keep those characteristics in the back of your mind as you read.

Thank you for your consideration,

Miriam

The Bird and The Fish: Memoir of a Temporary Marriage

Dear Readers,

I’m excited to announce that in the next month, The Bird and The Fish—Memoir of a Temporary Marriage, will be available.

We human beings take various actions in romantic relationships for our own good reasons, don't we? What drives us? When you read The Bird and The Fish, you may wonder why the two main characters did what they did. Perhaps you will guess at the universal longings each one was trying to fulfill.

I grew up in Belgium and the United States, two different societies, but they were not that different from each other. However, when I met Afshin, I knew that his lens of the world was very different from mine. Living with him would give me a chance to peer through that lens and see an unfamiliar set of traditions and standards. I was excited at the thought. I did not think it would lead to anything more than an education about aspects of Iran. What a surprise when the opportunity arose to have my education come in an unusual package—an intimate one. Will you join me on a portion of the path I took?

The following is the description of the story that appears on the back cover of the book:

Afshin, a captivating Iranian graduate student, rents a room in Miriam Valmont’s home. Landlady and tenant share an immediate and fast-growing attraction, despite the fact that Miriam is twice Afshin’s age. When Afshin proposes a temporary Islamic marriage, Miriam readily agrees, driven by desire and curiosity. What shocks her, though, is the role Afshin invites her to play at the end of the marriage so that he, as a Muslim, can continue to express affection. The Bird and the Fish is the story of two people with radically different lives who find a way to honor a passionate love that they know cannot last.

If you’d like to receive an announcement when the book (hardcover or e-book) is available, would you send that request to miriamvalmont@gmail.com?

For engaging and fulfilling lives,

Miriam

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